Fall Movie Preview!

Words cannot express how ridiculous this Fall's crop of movies is going to be. Whether you want horror, sci-fi, comedy or drama, this fall has it. I predict, even a few months out, the closest Oscars race in many years. So now without further ado, my Fall movie Preview. Unlike my TV preview, these aren't ranked by how much I want to see them but rather listed by release date (because I can't possible rank how much I want to see these movies).

October 16th
Beasts of No Nation: This movie is directed by the mind that brought us the True Detective drug raid scene (youtube it). It stars Ildris Elba and should be gritty, dark and super good. Bonus! It's premiering on Netflix so you don't have to spend money on this one!

Crimson Peak: I don't necessarily go for these kind of movies, but everything about this has me intrigued. The cast (Tom Hiddleston, Jessica Chastain) is top-notch for horror-fantasy movies and the director, Guillermo Del Torro, knows a thing or two about these kind of movies.

Bridge of Spies: I would have almost no interest in this movie EXCEPT that it stars Tom Hanks directed by Steven Spielberg. The fact that it's a WWII story (Spielberg's best period) is icing on the cake. NOTE: All three of these movies come out the same day, but then there isn't much for a while, so you can space them out.

Suffragette, Oct. 23: I'm not really excited for this movie so much as I think it will be really good and helpful for people to see. I expect a really good drama, but I doubt it to make many Oscar waves (except Meryl Streep for Best Supporting Actress seems like a good possibility).

Spectre, Nov. 6: I only recently watched the recent James Bond story arc, and boy was I missing out. Skyfall was excellent by any movie standard you wish to apply descending the "spy" genre with its greatness. All signs point to Spectre delivering just as much. Plus Christophe Waltz as the main villain.

Legend, Nov. 20: Tom Hardy plays twin brother gangsters in 1960s London. I love crime thrillers and Tom Hardy so I'm on board.

November 25th

The Good Dinosaur: My excitement for this movie crashed dramatically when I learned that Bob Peterson was no longer the director. Still, it's Pixar so it should be good, but don't expect it to come anywhere near Inside Out.

The Night Before: I like Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogan and I really like 50/50 which had both of them and the same director as this movie. That's enough for me to think this might be a surprisingly good comedy (or at least surprising to the rest of the world).

The Danish Girl, Nov. 27: This movie tells the story of a transgender artist long before that was close to being an acceptable thing. The cast is strong including Oscar Winner Eddie Redmayne (many people's pick to repeat this year) and director Tom Hooper (of King's Speech and Les Mis fame). In my mind this movie is probably one of four really big Oscar contenders.

 December 18th

Sisters: I think there's about a 100 percent chance that this movie will be really funny...and not be talked about at all when it comes out. It stars Amy Poehler and Tine Fey who are very funny people. See it sometime in the week after it opens because...

Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens: It finally arrives! I'm no where near as excited for this movie as about 100 million Americans, but I am excited all the same. I'm especially curious to see Adam Driver take on a big villain role and wonder if the story might center on him. One can only hope.

December 25th

The Hateful 8: I'm WAY more excited for this movie than for Christmas. Everything I've seen makes it look like Django Unchained level of great, and that's pretty stinking great. Tarrantino might have a long-shot at Best Director with this one.

Joy: I'm also really excited for this movie, reuniting Jennifer Lawrence, Bradley Cooper and director David O'Russell. That group made two really awesome movies (Silver Linings Playbook and American Hustle). I don't really even care what it's about, I think it should be great.

The Revenant, January: Last but not least (like really REALLY not least) The Revenant. Leonardo DiCaprio. Tom Hardy. The director of Birdman. Do I need to go on? If you insist. It's also a frontier story of survival. I predict major Oscar wins for this one including an Oscar (finally) for Leo. The only caveat to that being the performance of Eddie Redmayne. At this point The Revenant is my pic for Best Director, Best Picture, Best Actor, as well as some editing categories. I don't care when it comes out in January, I'll be there.

I hope this gets you as excited about watching movies this fall as it does me! I'm super excited for all these movies and the stories they'll generate. Rest up for October 16th!

Fall TV Preview!

I've been trying to write this post for weeks, but I've just been so busy. This last week many, many shows had their fall premieres, so I figured if I didn't get this preview out quickly there would be no reason to do it at all. And that wasn't an option. There is so much potentially great TV coming out this fall that I had to limit the list to 15. The shows are ranked by how much I want to watch that show. With some shows I've seen one or two episodes already, and that will factor into the rankings, though, so far, the shows I've seen have been good, so it won't factor in too much. Now without further ado my ultimate Fall TV Preview (including new and returning shows)!

TV Shows

15. Best Time Ever with Neil Patrick Harris. The only reason I have any interest in this in NPH. The reviews so far have been mixed. I haven't seen it yet.

14. Into the Badlands. I don't know much about this show, but I think AMC is due for a hit. This miniseries probably wont be that, but it might get them back on the right track.

13. Better Call Saul. I rank this so lowly because I don't expect it to come out till early 2016 (and if I include early 2016 titles then I have to put Westworld top of this list). So since it's kind of cheating to have it here at all, I rank it lowly.

12. Blind Spot. Like AMC, NBC is due for a hit. I wonder if this twisty thriller will be it (I'm skeptical and probably wont get around to watching this one for a while).

11. Late Night with Stephen Colbert. I watched the episode with Donald Trump and Stephen seems to still be in top form. I'll be interested to see if he can establish a youtube identity like Fallon. Time will tell, but I'm glad he's back on TV.

10. A.K.A. Jessica Jones. My excitement for this is based on three factors: Netflix, Kristen Ritter and David Tennant. I love all these people/things and am excited to see what this show will be. I really like that virtually no one knows anything about it to this point, so we will see. I'm excited to see how this will do launching full-on into the female superhero canon of TV.

9. Supergirl. And that leads us to the other show that I think will do good things for Superhero TV. When I watched Whiplash a few months ago I said, "That Melissa Benoist girl is going places." And here she is in a staring superhero vehicle. CBS makes good TV. This whole show is a really interesting experiment in the future of superhero TV. Let's hope it goes well.

8. Doctor Who. All the trailers and the first episode have this poised to be one of the best seasons yet. I'm excited to see it all come together, though the apparent rise of 2-part episodes has me worried.

7. American Horror Story: Hotel. I was pretty turned off to the AHS brand after the very lack luster final episodes of last season. BUT I think the introduction of Lady Gaga and the setting of a hotel will provide a much needed surge. The fifth season is a make-or-break season in TV shows (more on that some other time); AHS needs to come on strong this year.

6. Sherlock. I've heard so little talk of Sherlock's return that it's easy to almost forget that it's happening. BUT IT'S HAPPENING SO GET EXCITED!!

5. Scream Queens. Mixed review have done little to assuage my excitement for this show. I'm excited to see how the AHS team do at tampering done the horror factor a little for broadcast TV. The cast is beyond outstanding, so I predict good things.

4. The Muppets. I watched the pilot and was actually surprised at how well they captured the essential-ness of the Muppets while also pointing them in new directions. I'm excited to see how this show progresses this season.

3. Master of None. Aziz Ansari is making his own show on Netflix. That's really all you need to know. I love Aziz and I love Netflix. I'm hoping this show is like Louie except that it's actually funny.

2. South Park. Two weeks ago I probably would have ranked this 4th or 5th but that was before two nearly perfect episodes to start the season brilliantly skewering the PC culture of the summer, Tom Brady and the current election landscape. Also I love how they're following in last season's stead tying the season together with themes and jokes. It's better than ever (except the revered season 7).

1. Fargo. I STILL know almost nothing about this season even after watching all the cryptic trailers and such. My excitement is almost unmeasurable for this new season. It's been something of a down year for anthology shows, but that's about to change.

That's it for TV. Tune in next time for my movie preview!

Emmy Predictions

I have a really substantial Fall movie and TV show preview I'm working on, but today it occurred to me that the Emmys are this weekend, so this post takes precedent. I write this post as a simple prediction of ALL the Emmy winners, regardless of whether I have any clue what I'm talking about or not. I can only hope to do any where near as well as I did at the Oscars getting about 20 out of 25 correct (and I totally out-thought a couple of them too). Whether you think that's impressive or not, I assure you, I could have made a lot of money betting on the Oscars if I'd done that well. But this is about the Emmys, so here we go. (These are in the order I find them on the Emmys website).

Best Actor in a Miniseries: David Oyelowo. My reasoning here is simple: he didn't win the Oscar. I have no clue about any of these movies and shows so my guess is as good as yours.

Best Actress in Miniseries: Emma Thompson. I'm going away from the AHS norm on this category, because the nominations went away from the AHS norm. It'd be cool to see Sweeney Todd win.

Best Actor in a Comedy: Jeffery Tambor. The popular pick is Louie C.K, but from what I've heard, he's lost some steam. Tambor did really well earlier this year and I think his hot-button transgender performance will get him the win.

Best Actor in a Drama: Jon Hamm. I want very badly for Jeff Daniels to win this one, but I suspect they'll give it to Hamm as the Mad Men hold over. If I picked the award, I'd probably go Kyle Chandler. Seriously, this category is tight.

Best Actress in a Comedy: Amy Poehler. Tough call between new comers (Amy Shumer) and holdovers, but since I picked Hamm, I might as well pick his similar-situation female counterpart.

Best Actress in a Drama:Robin Wright. I don't know, but she's won before.

Best Production Design: The Oscars. Who really even understands this category? I mean, really.

Best Children's Program: Girl Meets World.

Choreography: I'm not stooping so low as to pick one dance episode over another. I have standards.

Best Cinematography in Miniseries: Houdini

Best Comedy: Silicon Valley. This is a long shot, but I think the reign of Veep has to end sometime. I want it to be Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, but I doubt it.

Best Writing for Comedy: Veep. It only seems normal that they would win something.

Best Writing for Variety: Last Week Tonight by John Oliver. What? Did I just pick NOT John Stewart? Yes, I did, because John Oliver has hit another level of relevance as of late (and seriously it is just the best show).

Best Commercial: I don't care.

Best Directing for Comedy: Silicon Valley.

Best Directing for Variety: Colbert Finale (or I assume it was the finale).

Best Directing for Drama: Game of Thrones (one of them, probably Mother's Mercy). I still can't believe Hardhome wasn't nominated.

Best Directing for Miniseries: AHS.

Best Directing for Variety Special: SNL 40th.

Best Documentary: The Jinx

Best Drama: Better Call Saul. I just don't believe in House of Cards. I'm sorry, but I don't. I think the recognition of Odenkirk as Best Actor nomination gives them a real shot at this upset. Lets not forget how beloved Breaking Bad was (even last year against True Detective).

Best Technical Direction: Letterman. How am I supposed to know? No one predicts these categories.

Best TV Movie: Nightingale.

Best Composition for Miniseries: AHS.  But what an eclectic group of nominees.

Best Composition for Drama: House of Cards.

Best Original Music and Lyrics: The Oscars.

Best Variety Special: SNL 40th.

Best Supporting Actor in Comedy: Tituss Burgess. This should be a landslide, but who knows.

Best Supporting Actor in Drama: Jonathan Banks. Ben or Peter would also be good picks.

Best Supporting Actress in Comedy: Allison Janney. I think she won last year so...yeah.

Best Supporting Actress in Drama: Uzo Aduba.

Best Sound Editing: Game of Thrones: Hardhome. Seriously, this had BETTER win. Also there are a LOT of Emmys.

Best Writing for Drama: Mad Men: Person to Person. It was the finale.

Best Writing for Variety Special: SNL 40th. I don't like Louie, so I pick him.

Best Documentary: Citizenfour

Best Sound Mixing for Non fiction: Going Clear.

Animation Achievement: Over the Garden Wall.

Best Casting for Miniseries: AHS.

Best Costumes for Special: I didn't know that was a thing.

Sound Editing: Houdini.

Title Design: AHS. Also, I'm glad that award exists.

Hairstyling: AHS.

Main Title Music: Penny Dreadful. Surprised GoT isn't there.

Music Direction: Oscars.

Documentary: Going Clear.

Cinematography for Doc.: The Jinx. (They'll win the other ones too, I guess.)

Best Special Effects: Game of Thrones.

Best Animated Program: Over the Garden Wall

Best Casting for Comedy: Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

Best Casting for Drama: Orange is New Black

Okay. I'm saying enough is enough. That's almost 50 predictions, so way more than you'll find from anyone else on the internet. That's all I've got. Have fun watching the Emmys!!

Why I Love Movies

Many times in my life I have been asked a terrifying question: "What is your favorite movie?" For years I have caved under the pressure of summarizing a broad love into a single 2 hour film, so I usually skirt around the question. That it until last week when I read a blog by Jon Negroni. For those of you who don't know, Jon Negroni is the genius behind the expansive-now-made-into-a-book Pixar Theory that all the Pixar movies are connected in the same universe. He is a great thinker with great opinions on movies. On this blog when asked his favorite movie, Jon flipped the question to articulate five movies that show why he loves movies. 

This got me thinking so now I've done the same thing with this post. It is good to keep in mind that this post is NOT a ranking of my favorite movies but rather an articulation of why I love movies. Some of my favorite movies didn't make the list, but most did. I really love this exercise because it reframes the standard query from a "what" question to a "why" question, which yields a deeper, more thoughtful response. So here are five movies and five shows that show why I love movies. The ranking articulates the importance I place on what they bring to the table, not necessarily how I would rank them in terms of personal favorites.

Five Movies to Show Why I love Movies

5. Oceans 11 (2001)- This movie has always had a soft spot in my heart but it makes this list because it blends genres better than any other movie I can think of. Oceans 11 is part comedy/part action/part heist movie, yet the blending of this genres just works perfectly. Brad Pitt and George Clooney epitomize how two really good lead actors can enhance the performance of all the other cast members. 

4. When Harry Met Sally- I will go on record that When Harry Met Sally is one of my favorite comedy movies (romantic or otherwise), but that alone does not place it on this elite list. It makes the list because in my estimation, WHMS captures the perfect formula of what a comedy should be: a few actors in the prime of their careers with a competent supporting cast, a pretty good script and a REALLY good story. What sets this movie apart from others is the questions it asks. It presents the very real, difficult question "can men and women really be 'just friends'" and by asking this, strips down the finery of the movie to it's most base components. Good movies ask really good questions, and this one still has me baffled. 

 

3. Up- In my opinion, Up is the greatest achievement in animation. It was nominated for Best Picture for a reason (in a really solid year, I should add). Up makes this list because it clearly shows animated "kids" movies transcending the typical conventions. It's sad, intense, genuinely frightening and conveys deep meanings probably lost on its youngest viewers. No one worth their salt can classify Up as "just a kids movie" and for that reason it raises animation to new heights without sacrificing characters or story. 

2. Psycho- Psycho makes this list because it shows how cinematography, lighting, music and direction make a movie into a masterpiece. The story of Psycho isn't all that creative or compelling, but the cinematography is, I believe, second to none. Hitchcock's choice of shooting it in black and white even though color was common in 1960 captures why he was the genius that he was. Color would kill this movie and he knew it. Everything about this movie defies genre conventions, as well as those pioneered by Hitchcock himself. It's truly a masterpiece like no other.

1. Inception- Inception is my go-to answer for favorite movie for the simple reason that I've seen it some dozen times. Inception tops this list because it shows the number one reason I love movies: they are puzzles. It doesn't matter what the genre, all of the movies on this list (and my other favs that I didn't mention) are puzzles in some way. Because when movies have a puzzle element to them, they are just way more fun to watch and rewatch so you can catch another little touch of the director or track another fan theory. Inception brings together many of my favorite actors, my favorite director and a complicated story with so many levels and layers that you absolutely have to watch it many times. Ultimately that is what I love about movies: top-notch professionals creating a story yarn that I have no choice but to unravel and comprehend. 

I hope this has inspired you to think about you favorite movies differently and taught you a bit more about me. Next time I'll do the same thing with TV shows, which is an even harder task!

The Moment in the LEGO Movie that Changed Everything

If you haven't seen the LEGO Movie, stop reading this post and see it as quickly as humanly possible. It is one of the finest pieces of animation to grace human eyes and can genuinely rank among such titles as Shrek, Emperor's New Groove and many Pixar movies. So go watch it, get that little Lonely Island song stuck in your head and come back to read the blog.

I could easily rant about WHY the LEGO Movie was the ridiculous gem that it was (hint: it's the same formula as all good comedy movies), but that's not the focus of today's post. Today's post concerns a moment that happens 2:23 into the movie. At this point we've seen the opening scene of the movie. As a refresher, this scene depicts Vitruvius in some cave. He briefly interacts with some guards, then Lord Business enters the scene. He instantly steals the scene (like Will Ferrell often does) and eliminates any shreds of doubt that this movie won't be amazing. He and Vitruvius have a short scuffle that leaves Vitruvius blinded and the mysterious weapon, the Kragle, in the hands of Lord Business. Vitruvius then utters a prophecy about a special "lass or fellow" with "face of yellow" that will come along and "make the piece of resistance found" (Even writing that sentence, I cringe at the grammar). He concludes his prophecy saying, "All this is true because it rhymes". Lord Business, not being one for poorly formed unmetered poetry, kicks Vitruvius down into some lava or something and leaves.

Okay. That's the opening scene that takes the first 2:21 of the movie, but then there is a single second shot that changes everything. The scene changes and a blank yellow background reads "8 1/2 Years Later".

On the surface this moment may seem trivial, and it's certainly easy to miss, but I think it's implications for the rest of the LEGO Movie are profound. Lengthy passages of time in movies are interesting, but they're especially interesting when kids are involved. Toward the end of the movie, we come to find out that a boy named Finn is the son of the dad played by Will Ferrell. The movie does a brilliant job layering the story lines outside the LEGO world with those within, so it's clear that Dad/Lord Business is the villain in both, intent on freezing the LEGO world with Krazy Glue. Finn/Emmet is the hero set on stopping the Krazy Glue so LEGOs can still be used by master builders to blend sets and create. The crux of the movie hinges on the struggle between structured business and childlike, rampant creativity.

I promise, all that explanation was really important because the kid in the movie looks like he could be about 8 1/2 years old. I can't find the actual ago of Jadon Sand, the kid who played Finn, but the internet seems to be in total agreement that the kid is about 8 1/2. This means the opening scene of the movie happened before Finn was born or else shortly after he was born. One article on LEGO Movie easter eggs picks up on this point, but doesn't stretch it out far enough. It says "...Though it's never explicitly stated, when Finn was born, The Man Upstairs locked his toys away, separated the worlds, and made sure that his son would never play with them" (Alex Zalben, MTV*).

I think it's safe to say that Finn is 8 1/2 and thereby cannot be the one playing with the toys (i.e making the opening scene) at the beginning of the movie. This leaves the question "who is making it happen?" The obvious and only suggested choice is Dad. But this still leaves many questions, chief among them "How does this scene fit with the rest of the movie presented by Finn?"

Allow me to suggest the following explanation. Dad, knowing his wife is about to have their first child, goes downstairs to the basement and locks up his LEGO toys. He has a very large collection that fills the majority of the basement. LEGOs obviously aren't safe for a zero-year-old kid and neither is the basement. He is doing a GOOD think by locking up the toys. When he is down there to lock up the basement, he stops for a moment and plays with a couple of his old toys. He picks up Lord Business and Vitruvius and plays out a short scene. In this scene Lord Business, by no means the villain in his mind, finds some Krazy Glue and takes it out of the scene. This makes perfect sense on both a LEGO level and a human level. In the LEGO world the action could be read as either sinister or helpful, since the Kragle is an obvious weapon. In the human world, it is simply a dad (or soon-to-be-dad) picking up some Krazy Glue and taking it upstairs where it can be of more use.

Now I think this is a really positive and really probable explanation for the beginning of the film, but now we have to see how it fits with the rest of the movie. I can think of two pretty solid possibilities for how this Dad becomes the "villainous Lord Business" that keeps the toys from his 8 1/2 year old kid. Unfortunately both of these half-formed theories are much sadder than the idea I just entertained. You've been warned.

-Option 1. After having Finn, Dad and Mom's lives got really busy. In the process of raising a toddler, Dad grew hardened toward his childhood toys and grew more preoccupied with work (i.e "Business"). Along the way (by my guess 5-6 years after having Finn) he and his wife had a baby girl (this fact is explicitly stated at the end of the movie when Duplo blocks show up). Now preoccupied with a combination of the new baby/young toddler, Dad forgets about his toys in the basement and forgets that Finn is old enough to play with them. Finn gets down there anyway and plays with them leading to the heartwarming ending of the movie.

Though pretty possible, this explanation leaves several things unexplained, namely why Lord Business/Dad has tons of Krazy Glue down there to start hardening the LEGOs together. The next explanation is sadder still, but it solves this problem.

-Option 2. Mom and Dad have Finn and life is really great. Finn grows up for a few years and the family is really happy. When he's 4-5ish, they decide to have another kid. Finn isn't a toddler anymore and the parents likely have stable jobs. They have a baby girl, but then, tragedy strikes. Mom dies, either in childbirth or shortly thereafter, leaving Dad to raise Finn and his sister on his own.  He weathers the first couple years without her reasonably well, but then falls on hard times. In order to keep the family afloat, he has to sell his expansive collection of LEGOs to a museum. He systematically goes downstairs gluing LEGOs. This could have been going on a long time. Remember, we only see basement one time. It's possible he had even more LEGOs at one point. Wild Style does talk of worlds we don't see. The ending is a reconciliation with Finn, but also Dad moving on from the loss of his wife.

Now I understand this is a stretch, but in my mind, it is a possible or even probable explanation that allows the opening minutes to be acted out by Dad and the rest of the movie by Finn. Otherwise we have a Dad that has a RIDICULOUS NUMBER OF LEGOs he never uses, but locks them away from his son for no reason for years. This explanation at least explains why he wont let Finn play with the LEGOs; why he is hesitant to play with them himself; why he is gluing them together even though he once cared enough to own THAT many LEGOs; why the opening of sequence of Lord Business taking the Kragle works with the rest of the movie wherein he is using the Kragle.

As a quick point it's impossible for the Dad's collection to have been locked up, untouched, for this simple reason. In the middle of the movie, while in Cloud Cuckoo Land, we see a Milhouse figure. The Simpsons LEGO set was released shortly before the LEGO movie, so it's impossible for that figure to be in the basement unless the collection has been changed recently. It is possible that Finn carried it down there sometime, but I think it far more likely that Dad continues adding to the collection, even in small ways, because he REALLY loves LEGOs.

To summarize, Dad acts out the opening two minutes of the LEGO Movie. Around that same time he and his wife have Finn, causing him to lock the basement and keep it from Finn. 5-6 years later they have a daughter. Shortly after that Mom dies leaving Dad alone to raise two kids. This forces him to sell some of his prized LEGO worlds for money in order to provide for his family. The ending is both about reconciliation and moving on from the loss of his wife.

This theory needs a little work, but I think it's pretty solid. No matter what moviegoers have to deal with the discrepancy between the Dad acting out the first two minutes and Finn acting the rest of the movie. If you can think of another way to allow the Dad to be relatively heroic at the beginning and a villain later on, let me know. It is important to remember, he has an absurd amount of LEGOs that are clearly a huge part of his life. It has to take something drastic to cause him to glue them all down. This theory does change the meaning of the movie slightly, but if anything, it makes it all the more rich and satisfying.  

My Definitive Summer Movie Guide Review

Back in late May with summer movie season just barely upon us, I wrote a really long and extensive preview of all the greatness this summer had to offer. If you didn't read that post, it can be found here: http://rantsrankingsandreviews.blogspot.com/2015/05/my-definitive-summer-movietv-guide.html. Now with summer drawing to a close, I think it's time to take stock and see where I was right and wrong, as well as shed a little light on things I overlooked the first time around. So now, in the same order I talked about them the first time, my summer preview recap.

Tomorrowland. I haven't seen this movie yet. Critics and audiences alike were pretty spilt about it. I do plan to see it in the near future, but that might not happen because this fall is positively LOADED with TV and movies that I'll need to watch. I predicted B+. General opinion has this at C- or there abouts, so I'll say I missed with this one (but no definitive claim will be made until I see it).

Hannibal Season 3. I fell behind on this show (For some reason I really fail at watching weekly dramas that aren't on AMC, FX or HBO). I did see the first 4 episodes and they were top-notch, so I will certainly watch the rest of this season. Maybe I'll binge it this weekend. I also want to draw attention to the fact that on May 20th I wrote, "I'm still fearful of this show going the way of other Bryan Fuller projects (Pushing Daises) and getting canceled too soon..." and on June 22nd it was (despite really REALLY good reviews). My thoughts on this injustice are a rant for another day. I just want it to be know that I totally called that. I predicted A grade in May and hold to that grade. A

Sense 8. I also haven't seen this one yet, but the reviews are strong. My A- prediction seems to be on track, but I'll need to get back to this one when I see it.

Spy. In May I thought this would be a B+, but it turned out to be a strong A. Significantly funnier than the Heat, all the pieces come together for a real comedy treat. Even more surprising, the reviews have been 95%, which is unreal for comedy. Maybe Rotten Tomatoes has seen the error of their ways, but I doubt it. Anyway, this is an extremely funny movie that all fans of Bridesmaids should appreciate a LOT. A (very near A+)

Inside out. I thought it would be an A+ but it turned out to be an A++ and as good as just about any other movie I've ever seen. I already sang the praises of Inside Out at length, so go read that post for a further description. If you STILL haven't seen it, get on it ASAP! A++

True Detective Season 2. I don't what is the deal with critics because this season is not anywhere near as well received as Season 1. I think because it wasn't as "star studded" they lost their minds while reviewing it. Seriously, I'm almost certain that I like this season MORE than season 1, though that it at least part due to the fact that I'm really studying the story this year. I will sing the praises of this show more soon I imagine. Critics don't know everything and True Detective is still exceptional TV at the level that only Netflix and HBO (and occasionally AMC/FX) can deliver. A+

Drunk History and Nathan For You. In an exceedingly rare intelligent programming move by Comedy Central (seriously, they don't know what they're doing most of the time), they moved the premieres from the dead time of summer to prime slots in the fall. Also on the REALLY long shot that Drunk History wins the Emmy for which they're nominated, ratings will skyrocket. I have high hope for season 3.

Spoils Before Dying. I've only seen the first third of the miniseries at this point, so I can't speak to the whole of the show, but I liked what I saw so far. I think my predicted A is right on point.

Minions: Haven't seen it, but the reviews have been middling at best. It looks like my B+ will probably be more of a B-.

Ant-Man. I was one of the few people out there really stoked for this movie, and it totally delivered. The writing was as good as any Marvel movie, the story was fresh and Paul Rudd was amazing. I predicted an A and it certainly was. 

Trainwreck. I haven't gotten around to this one yet either, but the reviews have been great. I plan to see this one really soon. It seems like my predicted B- will probably be closer to a B+ or an A.

Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp. This is a beautiful show in every way. It delivers on all the same levels as the brilliant movie while adding to the experience in new ways too. It reminded me very much of how Arrested Development handled their reboot for Season 4. Watch the movie then watch this show. It's brilliant in every way. A+

Rick and Morty. They aren't far into their second season yet, but I can already tell that it will be on par or better than season one. The pilot was ridiculously amazing. My A+ line of thought is right on the money with this one.

BoJack Horseman. Netflix kinda sprung Season 2 on me with very little warning, but it's awesome. Better than the first in many ways and a good show to tide me over until South Park, The Simpsons, Bob's Burgers and more return in the fall. A


Now a brief series of bullet points about the things I didn't have on my radar the first time around:

-Mad Max: Fury Road. I hadn't seen this when I wrote the post in May. It's one of, if not THE, greatest action movies I've ever seen. A+

-Vacation. Don't believe the poor critic reviews. The new Vacation reboot is as good as the original (at least from my 21st century standpoint) and is probably the funniest movie since 22 Jump Street. A+

-7 Days in Hell. Words can't descibe the greatness of this TV movie. It's Andy Samberg being as fantastic as he was in Hot Rod mixed with awesome interjections from Bill Hader and Fred Armisen. You don't need more than that. A

-The Gift. I might be reaching here, but this new movie has me really excited. Best reviews on a thriller since Gone Girl. I predict A.

That's all for now. I should probably stop saying what I'll do next because I haven't followed it yet. But you should expect thoughts on the Emmys, a few more Best Pic nominees and you will certainly get thoughts on Fargo soon.

Top 14 Albums since 8/14

I probably will get back around to talking about last year's other best picture nominations, but today I want to talk about music. This year starting in May I upgraded to Spotify premium and it's totally changed my music life forever. So between a 10 road trip, time driving around town and now a job at which I can listen to music for 5 hours a day, I've listened to a lot more music than usual so far this year. Some of it has been bad, but most has been really good. I might update this in the fall because I strongly suspect Honeymoon (Lana Del Ray) and Uncomfortable (Andy Mineo) will make the list. Here are a few of my top picks for best album of 2015 so far (this is a ranking, but to even make the ranking, you've got to be pretty good).

* So that was the plan until I realized a half dozen of the albums I wanted to include actually came out in 2014. So the list will be amended to be My Top 14 Albums since August 2014.

Top 14 Albums since 8/14

14-11--Rookies and Veterans

14. Bulletproof Picasso-Train. This album doesn't capture the greatness of some of the other train albums, namely Save Me, San Francisco, but it still delivers some good songs. I'm especially partial to the title track and Angel in Blue Jeans

13. American Beauty/American Psycho-Fall Out Boy. Fall Out Boy is a weird band to talk about because they set their ceiling impossibly high with From Under the Cork Tree back in 2005 and had no chance of replicating that greatness again in their lives. That said, this record is solid and good step forward to the pop-rock genre after Save Rock and Roll.

12. Bombs Away-Sheppard. This band is a newcomer known currently for the song Geronimo. I don't like that song very much, but the rest of the album is really solid. They remind me of another band that will make the top 5. I wouldn't be surprised if they keep rising.

11. The Desired Effect-Brandon Flowers. This record is the first solo project from The Killers frontman, Brandon Flowers. Though something different from The Killers, the sound is still familiar and refreshing. This could be higher on the list, but I haven't listened through it as many times as some of the others.

10. Talking is Hard-Walk the Moon. This band exploded with the song Shut Up and Dance but the rest of the album is really good, too. It's fun, dancy, poppy with interesting melodies and lyrics. A lot of similar bands sound stale quickly, but Walk the Moon keeps sounding fresh every time.

9. Pageant Material- Kacey Musgraves. I was a big fan of Kacey Musgraves's first album Same Trailer Different Park and the song Merry Go Round. Her sophomore release follows in the steps of the first album with more deft plays on words and complicated lyrics. Her sound is still very much reminiscent of vintage Taylor and The Band Perry. Fans of Taylor's country days should definitely check her out.

8. Moonshine in the Trunk- Brad Paisley. This album captures all that Brad Paisley does best: catchy earworms with clever and hilarious lyrics. Limes, High Life, Gone Green and Country Nation all should rank among his best songs (or at least be well regarded). This album is hilarious, up tempo and really, really fun: perfect summer music.

7. Anomaly- Lecrae. Most of my friends really love this album. I think it's pretty great, but not outstandingly great. It's a solid effort, but it's not as great as Church Clothes in my opinion. However, I'm still really happy that it did really well because it brought great prominence to Christian Rap on the mainstream. The genre is on the way up for sure.

6. Queen of the Clouds- Tove Lo. After 1989 (obviously still coming on the list), I searched for months and months to find something that could sort of replace the Taylor shaped whole in my music life. I finally found it in the album. Tove Lo is a little bit edgier than Taylor but the sound is the same. The album as a whole is well laid out to communicate a greater story than isolated tracks. Few if any of the songs fail to be enjoyable and good music. Talking Body and Timebomb are probaly my favorites songs off the album.

5. Mansion- NF. Mansion by newcomer NF is quite likely the best Christian rap album I've ever heard and certainly the best debut album. I describe him a cross between Eminem and Macklemore with that same anger and edge communicated with great skill through rap music. I'm now a fan for life and eagerly await any upcoming albums. I can't pick favorite songs because they're all amazing.

4. Kids in Love- The Mowgli's.  Though not as outstanding as Waiting for the Dawn, the sophomore release by the Mowgli's has still been played over and over on my iPod. Their sound is as strong as ever, reminiscent of Echosmith and Sheppard. They're coming to Portland soon and I'm excited. Kids in Love advances the skill of the Mowgli's in that this album is more thoughtfully composed together, tied together with a theme of childlike innocence and love. It's fantastic in every way.

3. Pain Killer- Little Big Town. I love this album a lot. I have a huge crush on the song Girl Crush, but the rest of the album is also amazing. It is an artful blend of slow and fast songs with both rock and country dynamics at play. Pain Killer delivers variety for all country fans, whether you want more of that Boondocks sound or something more akin to a slower ballads, Pain Killer delivers.

2. Grand Romantic- Nate Ruess. Like Brandon Flowers, Nate recently branched off from his long time band to try it solo... and it worked exceptionally well. This album delivers everything I loved about the Some Nights album (Fun.) while still advancing Nate's identity as a solo artist forward. Pretty much the whole album is gold and great for capturing the grand romantic in all of us. Harsh Light is my favorite song off it, but, like I said, the whole thing is amazing.

1. 1989- Taylor Swift. I recently ranked all 70+ songs off Taylor's five albums: 1989 has five songs in top 10 and 10 songs in the top 20. I didn't expect anything could be as good as Speak Now and Fearless, but Taylor proved me wrong with 1989. Wildest Dreams rapidly became one of my favorite songs ever. I very rarely skip any song off 1989 when it comes on my iPod or radio. With this album Taylor Swift further cemented her place in the upper echelon of entertainment and secured total pop dominance. Her country days are way behind her, and I'm okay with that.


I hope this list gave you something to check out next time you need new music. All albums on Spotify except for 1989 (but you need to own that one anyway). I would especially recommend The Mowgli's, Sheppard, Little Big Town and the Moonshine in the Trunk album as a perfect summer playlist. Thanks for reading and please comment albums that I overlooked.

Emmy Preview: Nominations

Today is a very exciting day on a TV fanatic's calendar much the same way a person gets excited about season premieres and finales and such. Because today is when they released the nominations for the 2015 Emmy awards! I don't respect the people behind the Emmy's anywhere near as much as I respect the Academy, but I still enjoy the Emmys and they still matter a lot in terms of ongoing success for some shows.

As a first note I will say that I'm way behind on the following contenders: OITNB (I'm in Season 1), House of Cards, Mad Men (again, Season 1), Silicon Valley (midway through Season 2), Veep (back in Season 1), Modern Family (Season 2) among others. I will endeavor to get caught up on some of those in the two months before the Emmys air, but no guarantees. However, as that list will show, while I may not be completely current, I'm relatively familiar with the show and watch other internet chatter about who will (and should) win. So even though I'm a little behind on some cases, my critical opinion is still at least somewhat valid.

As a second note, the nominations this year are dominated by what's not there: True Detective, Fargo and Daredevil. In the case of TD and Fargo, the sophomore seasons didn't air in time to be considered for awards. In terms of Daredevil, THEY JUST TOTALLY BLEW IT!!! I wasn't expecting a Best Drama nod or anything, but Vincent D'Onofrio deserved a Best Supporting Actor nod for his absolutely brilliant Heath Ledger-esque portrayal of the villainous Fisk. There is no excuse here. They just got it wrong.

With that in mind, let's get down to a breakdown of my thoughts by category. On some I won't have much to say, and on some I'll say a lot. I recommend you have the nominations open on a separate tab because I will not list them out for reference. 

Best Drama:  (I refuse to overuse "Outstanding" on every category)These Best Drama titles are pretty true to form. I'm very pleased to see Better Call Saul get a freshman nom it really deserves. I'm not so sure about Homeland. I feel like they've been nominated a lot and no one really ever talks about how good they are. I would have rather seen Bloodline or The Americans get some love here, but it's okay. 

Best Drama Actor/Actress: Did you think last year was tight for Best Actor with Harrelson, Mcconaughey, Stacey and Cranston all going for the top prize? This year will be even crazier! Allow me to explain. This year the nominees are: 

Bob Odenkirk, "Better Call Saul"

Kyle Chandler, "Bloodline" 
Kevin Spacey, "House of Cards"
Jon Hamm, "Mad Men"
Jeff Daniels, "The Newsroom"
Liev Schriber, "Ray Donovan"

I know nothing about Ray Donovan so I won't talk about it, but I watch all the others to some extent and they're all worthy of the prize. Odenkirk is amazing (as he always is) in Better Call Saul creating a really great character that's still fresh even from the Saul we knew in Breaking Bad. Kyle Chandler does an equally awesome job leading the tense Bloodline through its maze of plots and characters. Kevin Spacey is Kevin Spacey (more doesn’t need to be said). In the case of Jon Hamm and Jeff Daniels, this is there last time to win for the top prize for either Mad Men or The Newsroom respectively. I doubt I’ve ever seen a tighter race for Best Actor regardless of the media. In terms of Best Actress, the only one I've really seen in Robin Wright for House of Cards, but I'm really happy Tatiana Malslany got a nomination after being snubbed last year.

I'm not even going to talk about the miniseries category. It makes me really sad to see the list of names after the greatness that was Fargo and TD (Yes, I know they submitted as Drama last year but this year would have been Miniseries). This year the names are for a bunch of movies and such few people talked about and a ridiculous number of AHS nominations. David Oyelowo will win, and that's all I have to say about that.

Best Comedy: Unnnnnnbreakable! I'm very happy that Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (the best comedy in at least 5 years) got rewarded with so much Emmy love! Will it win lots of awards? I don't know. Best Comedy series is a tough race. Silicon Valley got a lot better this season as did Veep (or so I heard). Modern Family was probably really good (because it always is), Parks and Rec is in it's last year, and Transparent has won all the similar awards at other award shows up to this point. I really hope Unbreakable gets this one, because it would validate Netflix as the comedy empire it should be considered (since OITNB is only sort of a comedy anyway). It's a tough and interesting race for sure.

The Best Actress race is interesting too since it pits Amy Shumer (who's exploding like a supernova right now) against long time winner, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and hold over, Amy Poehler. Tituss Burgess had better win Best Supporting Actor.

Reality: I don't care in the slightest, but when the Awards roll around, I'll still make a prediction.

Variety Series: Toss up between Colbert and Daily Show since both are ending. You might even see Fallon come in and steal it, but that's unlikely. 

Directing: HOW DID HARDHOME NOT GET NOMINATED FOR BEST DIRECTING WHEN MOTHER'S MERCY AND UNBOWED, UNBENT, UNBROKEN DID!?!?!?!?!?! This is baffling to me and a complete disgrace.

Animation: South Park or Archer deserves to win this year. I've never heard of "Over the Garden Wall" and will investigate.

There are way too many Emmys when you look at all of them, but I'm still excited. If you haven't already you should absolutely watch Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and Better Call Saul. It's a great time for TV. The nominees don't capture all that greatness, so get yourself on Netflix and get watching! 

The Best Pictures of 2014 and Who Needs to See Them

Having finally watched Whiplash, I have seen all the Best Picture nominees from 2014 except Theory of Everything. I promise that I still intend to see this movie, but for today's purposes I will leave it out of the discussion. As an extension of that I will also avoid talking much about acting performances because that was the greatest success in critic minds of Theory of Everything. However, this still leaves us 7 movies to talk about: Birdman, Boyhood, American Sniper, Selma, Whiplash, Imitation Game and Grand Budapest Hotel (did I just rank them for you...? Perhaps I did, perhaps I didn't...). This post is part ranking/ part rant and part review. For each movie I will talk about why it was great and deserving of Best Picture Nominee status, and why it fell short of Birdman for the actual award. I'll also slip in comments about how it was snubbed or other things I find noteworthy. Finally for each movie I will state who HAS to see this movie and who SHOULD see this movie. I think I'll talk about them in the order I saw them, just to shake things up*. Also this is part one of a two-part post. I'll cover Boyhood, GBH and Selma today and American Sniper, Whiplash, Imitation Game and Birdman next time.

*Just kidding. I saved Birdman till the end, but other than that, it's in order.

Boyhood

Who Has to See This Movie: People currently between the ages of 18-23.

Who Should See This Movie: Everyone who participated in the 2000s decade and all people who admire accomplishments in filmmaking. 

Boyhood tells the story of a young boy as he grows up from age 5 to age 18. What makes the film remarkable is that it was filmed over that same period of time over something crazy like only 33 days (don't ask me how that's even possible). In this single movie we get to watch this kid and his family and the actors grow up and mature before our very eyes, and that's a rare sight. Despite its amazing achievement, there are times when the acting falls flat and the story isn't much of a story. The movie is about boyhood and the act of growing up. That's a story that needs to be told, but that doesn't mean it's the best story. Either way, I loved this movie. I cried; it inspired me; it captured my childhood (almost like I was watching Pixar or something...). 9/10

Grand Budapest Hotel

Who Has to See This Movie: BIG Wes Anderson fans.

Who Should See This Movie: All Wes Anderson fans.

I'm not a big Wes Anderson fan. I really liked Moonrise Kingdom and really like his movies as a whole, but he's not "one of the best directors" out there today like so many friends and critics say. He's just not. Maybe that's a rank for another day. Here's the rant for today: GBH wasn't that great of a movie but the Academy realized that they stilted Moonrise Kingdom out of accolades and nominations it should have gotten so they compensated and went OVERBOARD with GBH. Yes, the set design should have won. Yes, the costumes should have won, but it had NO business getting a Best Pic nom and Anderson had no business beating out Nolan for a Best Director nom. Thankfully, it lost both (to the deserving Birdman); I would have rioted if GBH had won Best Pic. It's a good movie, don't get me wrong, but it's nothing all that special and definitely not better than Moonrise Kingdom. 7/10

Selma

Who Has to See This Movie: Every American who wasn't alive in the 1960s.

Who Should See This Movie: Every American citizen.

I'm not usually a big fan of biopics because they tend to over-emphasize one person and leave the others as supporting cast at best (I'm looking at you, Lincoln). Selma didn't have that problem. While it is the Martin Luther King Junior movie, it's called SELMA and not MLKJ or something like that. Because this movie is about Selma. It's about the whole of America that rose up to protest injustice in Selma and it couldn't have come at a better time in our country. This is a movie about the dream of MLKJ as acted out by those around around him and parts of America as a whole. It shows us at our best and our worst, but either way it is timely, timeless and inspiring. I will not beat a dead horse, but OBVIOUSLY David Oyelowo deserved a nomination for portraying Martin and Ave Duvernay should have gotten a Director nom (this one I'm less upset about for a lot of reasons, but she was more deserving than Anderson*). 9/10

*It's important to remember that the Best Pic winner almost always has a Best Director nod (this is why everyone was outraged over Affleck's snub for Argo). By not giving Duverney a directorial nod it put Selma lower in the Academy's mind than it should have been. Everyone was actually talking like GBH might WIN and that was because of the director nom. It matters a lot.

I think that's enough to digest for one post but be on the look out for thoughts on the other 4 coming up really soon. 

The Pixar Formula: Why I Don't Have Much Difficulty Ranking Pixar Movies

Pixar is my childhood. My first theater movie was Toy Story 2. During my grade school days, my life literally revolved around Buzz Lightyear (as I used the Star Command show to orient my social calendar). Finding Nemo was the first time I remember crying in a movie. Now in 2015 Pixar releases their first movie in two years, their 15th film and their first non-sequel since 2009 (Yes, you heard me right, I'm not counting Brave. In my mind that was Disney, but that's for another rant).

This post serves as both a ranking but also a chance to talk about the greatness of Pixar which is truly second to none. In reference to that greatness, I want to begin by talking about a revelation I had two years ago that was recently confirmed by Inside Out. I will then use that revelation to explain why I rank Pixar films with relative ease. This will then be followed up with my official rankings of all 15 Pixar movies to date. I suspect this post to be lengthy (but also awesome because, you know, Pixar!)

Two years ago I was sitting in the theater watching Monsters University rebound admirably from Brave the year before and I thought, "This movie is really good, but not quite Pixar".  I figured out a short time later that what I meant by that cryptic thought is that it made me feel more grown up (college age) than like a kid. I began scrolling through the Pixar catalogue in my head and quickly realized that Pixar is at its absolute best the more a movie makes me feel like a kid again. What Pixar has done, through some of their greatest successes like Toy Story and Monsters Inc., is redefine what it means for something to be a "kids movie". I greatly enjoy many Dreamworks movies, but they never make me feel like Pixar movies because they are movies targeted at kids with the knowledge that adults will watch them too. This formula is far from bad and produces movies like Shrek which are better than ever after you've grown up and start getting all the jokes.

The Pixar Formula is different. Rather than make movies targeted at kids, I honestly think they make movies targeted at adults with the intent to make them feel like kids. The difference is huge. I genuinely think adults will enjoy Inside Out more than their children because its not so much a "kids movie" as it is an "animated movie that makes you feel like a kid". Pixar is all about the feeling. That's why you can watch wordless umbrellas or volcanos fall in love and cry because it's so awesome. Pixar understands that the chief goal of exceptional filmmaking is not to make tons of money but to make audiences really, truly feel something deeply. This end must be achieved honestly and without manipulation, but that's the goal of every exceptional Pixar movie.

It is for that reason that I am able to rank Pixar movies relatively easily*: because the best Pixar flicks make me feel life most deeply and the worst (which are still pretty great) don't quite get there.
* Turns out, that was way harder than I thought it would be, but it was still pretty easy.

And now here are my rankings of every Pixar Movie:
15. Brave- I strongly suspect Brave is a lot better than I remember it to be, but I know it's last on this list for one really simple reason. It came out 3 years ago and I've only watched it once. My problem with Brave is that it felt a LOT like a Disney movie and not at all like a Pixar movie. It had moments, sure, but it wasn't what I came to see. More on this in a future post.

14. Cars 2- Even though Cars 2 is second to last on this list, I have to say that I REALLY liked Cars 2 and think the world has bashed on it waaaaay too much. Cars 2 was good for what it was which was a spy flick, very sleek and very cool. If Dreamworks had released it, it would be universally lauded, but with Pixar we expected a higher standard, even from sequels. It was a sequel and delivered as such.

13. Monsters University- This movie was exactly as good as I expected it to be, but it was also way funnier (thanks to Charlie Day) and had way more heart than I anticipated. The ending sequence is pure gold. It wasn't as good as the first Monsters flick, but it was a worthy sequel (with a LOADED voice cast).

12. A Bug's Life- Tragically this is perhaps the most forgotten of all the Pixar films. It's a great story of friendship and family that also delivers tension and action. I probably have it this low only because everything else is so great. Also it doesn't follow my Pixar Formula for making you feel like a kid again.

11. WALL-E- This one totally delivers on the "magic" level, but the story fell a little flat. I will admit, WALL-E has grown on me a lot since it first came out and I now like it a lot more. I love the silent movie vibe of the first half, and the more I watch it, the less I mind some of the preachy-ness.

10. Toy Story- I imagine you're yelling at your screens right now saying "Daniel's a HYPOCRITE!!! He just said the best one make you feel like a kid so why's Toy Story so low!!!" That is a fair thing to say, but I'm not a hypocrite because Toy Story doesn't make me feel like a kid. I was 1 year old when that movie came out so I didn't experience it as the technological marvel that it was. I will say that I GREATLY respect Toy Story for what it is, I just don't find it overall as enjoyable as some of the other flicks.

9. Ratatouille- I wasn't totally on board with this one before it came out but have loved it ever since. What I loved about Ratatouille is its innovation. Pixar had delivered plenty of great non-human characters and plenty of great human characters, but this was the first real time they brought those two worlds together. 

8. Toy Story 3- THIS movie made me feel like a kid again. Pixar timed it all up so that Andy would age along with viewers on a real timeline of his life. I even took it a step further and somehow didn't see it when it first came out, so I was in my junior year of high school when I saw it for the first time. I cried a lot and it reminded me everything I love about movies and life. In terms of overall quality, it may very well be the finest of the Toy Story franchise. 

7. Cars- People bash on Cars a lot, and I don't think any of that hate is deserved. Cars has the best character growth of any Pixar character with a great story and many lessons to be learned. Just because it was about cars doesn't mean there's not a lot to love about Cars.

6. The Incredibles- It's painful for me to not have them in the top 5, but that is the reality of ranking Pixar movies. The Incredibles is my absolute favorite superhero movie with tons of action and great family fun. The technical value is expert and the music is second to one.

5. Toy Story 2- This movie will always hold a special place in my heart. Maybe it's the nostalgia and maybe it's the opening sequence out in space, but this movie remains one that I cherish very deeply. As already addressed, TS3 is probably better in terms of story and characters, but TS2 will always be my favorite.

4. Monsters Inc.- I've always loved this one, but the true awesomeness of it's blend of action and heart didn't hit me until recently. It's with this movie that we were all introduced to Pete Doctor (who has other films coming Up on the list). Monsters Inc perfectly captured the childhood fear and fascination with the monsters hiding in our closets. Through the lives of these characters we learned not to fear something different than us and that adventure my be inside our very bedroom. Monsters Inc fuels the fire for everyone's imagination and captures childhood expertly.

3. Inside Out- I know this just came out so it's hard to judge against movies I've seen dozens of times, but everything about it makes me think it should rank this highly. I loved every moment of Inside Out which captured childhood better than any other movie ever. Inside Out reveals that childhood is not only about good times but also moments of sadness. Even as kids we're really complex people. We don't know what will shape or effect us. I can't say a lot more without giving away spoilers, but Inside Out captures a certain magic and mystery of Pixar the likes of which I don't think I've ever seen before. It truly is as good as any other movie ever.

2. Up- Hardcore Pixar fans will notice that the 2-4 movies on this list are all the work of Pete Doctor. Because he's awesome. We all know Up is an amazing movie with equal parts humor and heart, but Up gives really good perspective on life from the point of view of a child or an adult that is often missed in other movies. Russell's life isn't great. His family is broken and his dad is missing from the picture. He lives for his wilderness explorer life of adventure. In Russell we see (before Inside Out) that childhood can be a hard thing but there is still adventure and good times to be had. Russell sits at the beginning of his life full of positivity and optimism, while Carl sits looking back on his life remembering the good times and the bad times. The story of Up allows them to meet in the middle where they both find adventure on a grand scale but also a familial scale. Carl flies his house around South America and discovers that the greatest adventure in life is that of your family. Up reminds viewers of all ages that the most important things in life are people and the adventures you have with them. To top all that off, the music is simply the best ever. 

1. Finding Nemo- This movie is probably the strongest family movie made as the love of Marlin is greater than the ocean. It reminds kids that their parents are still pretty cool and protective and reminds parents how much they love their kids. It takes us into the mysterious world of the ocean, while at the same time providing us with familiar animals and scenarios. Finding Nemo is probably the funniest Pixar movie with the best pacing and story of them all. 

I hope you enjoyed reading this blog as much as I enjoyed writing it. To sum up the Pixar Formula succinctly it is: Pixar makes kids movies that aim to make adults feel like kids and make kids treasure their childhood. Thanks for reading! 

A Rant on Game of Thrones Season 5

This will be rant on Game of Thrones season 5. If you haven't finished Game of Thrones season 5, turn back now for this post is dark and full of spoilers. However if you have finished it, read on and enjoy. I must preface this saying that I haven't read the books yet, so this rant is based purely on the show. Further than that it should be noted that, for the most part, I really liked this season. This rant is directed at the GoT fan base that's making themselves seem stupid on the internet.

In this season I would point to three main events that caused outrage on the internet: the rape of Sansa, the death of Shireen and the death of Jon Snow. In this post I want to rant about these events.

We begin with the rape of Sansa. I was downright shocked...by the reaction of the internet when this happened and not at all shocked by this event in the story. In my estimation the worst thing about the scene was the fact that Ramsey made Reek/Theon watch. Because he's a sick bastard (pun intended). I don't understand why the internet got so upset with this one because a) we've already seen rape on the show other times and b) we already know Ramsey is the worst person alive! This season I found myself hating him at near Joffrey levels. He's just that bad. So given that the act follows in line with his character and so we can't be "shocked" or "outraged" by it. Do you remember what he did in season 3? That was hardcore. Also think back to Season 1 wherein Dany gets raped by Drogo in a MUCH more graphic and on camera scene. Or think back to last season wherein Cersei gets (inexplicably) raped by Jamie. Given the graphic nature of those scenes, I say the rape of Sansa was the third worst rape of the show's history, and also not the worst thing Ramsey has done. I think the outrage of the internet on this matter boils down to the fact that most people like Sansa and all people HATE Ramsey. Our preferences deluded the internet into thinking this was the worst thing in GOT history, and it just wasn't.

Moving on to the death of Shireen. I was a little upset that this happened, but it was predicted often throughout the story. After watching five seasons of this show, we all know that if GOT starts using a character way more than in past times, something major is going to happen with them. Even more than that Melisandre and Stannis talked about EXACTLY this possibility early in the season. After one episode my friend even told me "I bet she makes him kill Shireen" and so it came to pass. I think the outrage of this one is based on the fact that it was a kid killed by her father by BURNING. That's a pretty brutal triangle but not something we need to get too worked up about. Firstly, we didn't know Shireen long enough to have much attachment to her. Secondly we've seen Stannis burn people before. Thirdly, we know he isn't the greatest dad in the world and that everything he does is directed at gaining the throne. The events of the next episode make me wonder why all this happened, but that's a different matter.

Finally we come to the death of Jon Snow and the complete and utter hatred of Olly, the boy who stabbed him last. I didn't like Jon snow. I never liked Jon Snow. I found all the scenes at the wall to be really boring 70% of the time throughout the run of the show. That said, I almost cried when he died out of shock and not of pity. I also don't like people saying "he's the one that's going to win" because it's just not going to happen. The actor playing Jon has strongly hinted that he's dead, and from what I've heard from book readers HE'S DEAD!!! So please internet, knock it off with all this "Melisandre will save him" because it's not going to happen. But even more that that, I'm upset about the hatred of Olly, I hate to break it to you guys but OLLY DIDN'T KILL JON SNOW!!! Olly helped kill Jon Snow after he'd already been stabbed several times. Even before Olly stabbed him, it was obvious that Jon Snow was about to die. That was about to happen. Olly just finished him off causing the internet to erupt with all these "he's the worst guy ever" when that's not even close to being true. Olly did nothing mean, vicious, or wrong. He, as a brother of the Night's Watch, fulfilled his duty to help kill the betrayer of their people. Whether it was right or wrong for them to do that is another matter entirely. By Night's Watch law that's what they were supposed to do. Olly had no part in deciding that should happen and no bigger part in carrying it out than any other member of the watch.

In summation: the show has done way worse things that the rape of Sansa (see everything done by Joffrey); Shireen's death was brutal but you can't be too upset about it because you couldn't have cared that much about her; Olly is no more at fault that anyone else in the death of Jon Snow; Jon Snow is DEFINITELY DEAD so shut up about how Melisandre is going to save him because he's dead. Like really really dead. As a doornail. No one else has come back in Thrones so he's not coming back either. He's dead.

That's it for this rant (which ended up much longer than I anticipated). I'll try to do a ranking in the near future or something more light-hearted.

Worth a Second Opinion

It's no secret I get a lot of my movie knowledge from Rotten Tomatoes. With action and drama movies especially I rely on their experts to tell me what I'll enjoy watching. And almost all the time if they like it, I'll like it and vice versa. But today I want to briefly review two movies I saw a while back that got relatively poor reviews and just sort of slipped through the cracks either due to their release dates or number of theaters, but I think they're pretty good movies.

First up is This is Where I Leave You. TIWILY came out last September in that weird time between all the big summer movies (May-July) and all the big Oscar movies (Oct-Jan). In other words it came out at the same time as movies like The Maze Runner that made us all think "I might see that sometime" but most likely we never will. That sort of time and movie. Rotten Tomatoes experts gave it 41% fresh and audience scores were only slightly better at 60%.

But I think they got it wrong on this one because TIWILY is actually a really, really good dramedy. The story follows a jewish family of adult children who have to live under one roof again for a week after their father dies. The family is made up of Jason Bateman, Tina Fey, Connor Stoll (the guy from Season 1 of House of Cards who always makes you think "That guy was on HoC!") and Adam Driver (the guy who generates the EXACT same reaction except with the show Girls). Their mom is played by Jane Fonda with supporting cast members including Rose Bryne and the under appreciated Kathryn Hahn (I can't think of anything specific for her but she's done bit parts in Step Brothers and a slew of other comedies).

Right from the cast I expect this to be a really good movie and it doesn't disappoint. The characters maintain their own identities will still meshing together like a real family. The chemistry between Bateman and Fey is marvelous and the whole movie effort just works. It's not the funniest movie in the world (which probably led to disappointed reviewers) but it's really sweet and really charming. It reminds you that family is a complicated thing, but one that you have to deal with in your life. I would liken it to August: Osage County as they have similar premisses, but also leave you with a similar sense of the importance of living life. In my book it's a solid B+/A- kind of movie that deserves a lot more love than it got (I mean, Bateman and Fey together?!?).


The second movie is The Last Five Years. This is an adaptation of the off-Broadway musical of the same name that originally starred Norbert Leo Butz (who is an amazing person, if you don't know). It got a slightly better, barely fresh 60 and 64% from critics and audiences respectively, but this movie completely missed everyone's radar. In the large city of Portland Oregon, not a single theater was showing it when it opened! The big mystery with this movie is why it didn't get a wider release. It came out last Valentines Day, so it'd have to compete with 50 Shades and Kingsman, but those were both rated R. I really believe there would have been a fine market for a PG-13 romance comedy musical on Valentines Day starting teen idol Anna Kendrick (fresh off Into the Woods), but I could be wrong.

The story tells a romantic relationship from start to finish, but it tells it from the guy's point of view and the girl's point of view while moving in opposite directions. So it jumps from a break up to the start of the relationship and back and forth. Kendrick is predictably amazing as Kathy (seriously, she's amazing in that role) and while her co star is no Norbert Leo Butz, he holds his own quite admirably. Like all good movie musicals (and I do mean ALL) the story is almost entirely musical numbers focusing almost exclusively on these two people. The movie does the play and the score justice without cutting a single song, and that's really really rare. My biggest and only complaint is a couple of modified lyrics to be without the F-word so they could keep the PG-13 rating, but that's just me being a purist. Anyway this movie should have been a big hit with great music and big star power behind it, but for some reason it slipped through the cracks.

So go watch those two movies. TIWILY can be found on HBOGO and I imagine L5Y can be found on DVD with relative ease. I don't know what I'll talk about next time, but I'm sure it will be something good. Expect Emmys chatter coming up soon because i get almost as excited about the Emmys as about the Oscars. (I watch way too much TV, but you knew this).

Caitlyn Jenner and Identity Struggles

I established this blog to be a place where I can write about TV and movies with the hope that maybe a few people will care to read it. This week I feel the need to address the much more significant and controversial topic of Caitlyn Jenner. Please note that I do not pretend to be an expert on anything, but I have been attempting to follow the story and feel I have the right to say my two cents.

As background, Bruce Jenner was an Olympic superstar back in the seventies as a icon of sports prowess and masculinity. And honestly I think that's the problem. As a society we built Jenner up as some pillar of hyper-masculinity which he (and almost everyone else) is not. I think most fundamentally, this is a conversation about identity. Gender Identity Disorder (recently termed Gender Dysphoria) is a "condition" you've probably heard a lot about this past week. Basically it means that you feel like woman or man when biologically speaking you are the opposite. I don't have this, but I imagine it would not be fun to have your identity diagnosed as a "disorder". For a long while homosexuality was "treated" in the same way which, thankfully, we have moved past now (but not without creating the horror stories of Alan Turing and others in the process).

Identity is a REALLY important thing to us as human beings, and I think that's the part of this discussion that is largely lost on people. Most of the voices I've heard in this conversation have come from Christian sources, which is great, but I think these Christian voices have largely overlooked the issue of identity. I am a Christian and as such (ideally) find my identity in Jesus. However, even this is really hard to do all the time. My church once did a 16 week sermon series on finding identity in Christ in just the 6 chapter book of Ephesians! He preached to us about identity for four straight months and I still forgot the message a week later! The phrase "in Christ" appears a TON of times in Pauline letters because it's something we as Christians just don't get very well.

Because we, like non-Christians, want to find our identity in the world. We want who we are to be based on our income bracket, material possessions, perfect wife and kids, social status, gender or anything else in the world. But here's the difference: as Christians we are called to find our identity NOT in those things but in Christ and love everyone. Our job is love in hopes of sharing Jesus and thereby eventually changing the heart desire to WANT identity in Christ. But if that person is non-Christian, that's our only job.

The actions of Caitlyn Jenner are not what I believe God's perfect world was all about, but we aren't in God's perfect world. We're in a world where giant countries don't have clean water and millions of babies don't even see their birth. Our world is very, very broken and a "disorder" of feeling like a woman when you are biologically a man is just another part of that brokenness but no more significant than any other elements of our broken world.

Actually, that's not true. It is more significant that other elements because this situation is public allowing us all to expose how judgmental and proud we really are. It gives us the chance to stand tall and point the finger at someone else ranting about how it "defames the image of women" when we don't realize that EVERYTHING around us has completely screwed up masculinity and femininity.

Which brings us back to this issue of identity and where it is found. Very few individuals take the time to actually think about what it is to be man or woman and consider the implications. When I started doing that, everything in my life changed.

I have seen enough of the tabloids and Keeping up with the Kardashians to be reasonably certain Caitlyn Jenner is not a born-again Christian which means that I have one and one place in this discussion and that is to love. Even if she professes to be Christian (as 90% of Americans do), that doesn't change much and it certainly doesn't give me the "right" to be judgmental. I'm happy this made so many headlines because it allows the cause of LGBTQ and such to move forward, and forward is always the right direction to be going. Because forward moves us toward a place of greater understanding, greater love and less judgment.

Christians, if you see headlines about Caitlyn Jenner and get more disgusted than when you think of people participating in porn, cheating on their spouse or ANY of sexual sin, then I think Jesus has major heart work to do with you. I've lived on this earth long enough to know we all sin sexually in one way or another, so signaling out any one "variation" of that sin over any other is a problem that is only hurting and hindering yourself. Caitlyn Jenner is not an insult to women, but every Christian who judges her identity issues or sexual sins more harshly than their own is an insult to the Gospel. I'm guilty of this as well; no one's perfect except Jesus so we should keep being like Him.

My Definitive Summer Movie/TV Guide

Well it has finally arrived! Summer is back once again and with it comes the year's best line up of TV shows and movies. Some big blockbusters have already come out (Age of Ultron, Mad Max: Fury Road) but all the movies I'm most excited for are still on the way. Rather than presenting this preview as a ranking or prediction of what will be the best, I'm going to outline the movies and shows I'm most excited for in the next few months in the order of their release. After my spiel I will include a grade for how good it will be. Maybe I'll come back at the end of summer and assess my grades, but who knows! Anyway on to the preview!

Tomorrowland, May 22nd. I don't know very much about this movie. I've seen only one trailer for it, but I really think it will be good. For one it's been in the pipeline at Disney for a long time, which means it will probably have a high production value and a good story. The second reason I'm optimistic is Brad Bird. I didn't see Ghost Protocol, but his other directing credits are top notch. He's also co-writing this project which makes me really optimistic. Grade: B+

Hannibal season 3, June 4th. This list includes returning shows, too because I've waited long enough! Hannibal is the only show on network TV that I really, truly get excited about. Every time I watch it I think "This is way too good to be on NBC". Season 2 was miles better than season 1, so it's only going up at this point. They left more than a few loose ends to tie up so I'm more than ready to see where season 3 goes. I'm still fearful of this show going the way of other Bryan Fuller projects (Pushing Daises) and getting canceled too soon, but for now it's on air so I will watch it. and you should too. Grade: A

Sense8, June 5th. I know very little about this show, but I do know two really important things: it's a Netflix original, it's directed by the Wachowski's. That's all the information I need to give it a shot. Watch the trailer and get excited. Grade: A-

Spy, June 5th. It's a busy weekend for movies and TV. Spy is the latest comedy offering from Paul Feig (director of Bridesmaids and the Heat). I'm pretty 50/50 on whether or not I like Melissa McCarthy movies, but she's been good when working with Feig in the past. The rest of the cast is really promising too (Rose Bryne, Jason Statham). This year has been really rough for comedy so far, but I think this one might be really good. Grade: B+

Inside Out, June 19th. This is a bold statement, but I stand behind it 100%: I think Inside Out will be the best Disney/Pixar movie since Up. Yes, I realize that this means it will be better that Tangled, Frozen, Toy Story 3 and Wreck-It Ralph, but I wholeheartedly believe it will be that good. I got really excited about this one over two years ago when I heard the concept for the first time. Watching the trailer made me even more excited. It's written and directed by Pete Doctor who's other Pixar work includes Monsters Inc. and Up. 2014 had no Pixar release, but I think it was worth the wait with Inside Out this summer and The Good Dinosaur coming up in the fall. Grade: A+ 

True Detective, June 21st. It's been a loooooong time since season 1 and I am MORE than ready for another dose of dark crime that is True Detective. This and Fargo were undeniably my favorite shows of 2014 and the wait for this was has been excruciating. I have waded through tons of casting rumors and more but the wait is almost over. The cast and crew are as stacked as last season and the promos couldn't be any more enticing. I'm very ready for its return. Look for it to destroy at the Emmys this year. Grade: A+

Drunk History and Nathan for You, July. There's no actual release date for the third season of these shows, but in the past Comedy Central has released them in July, so that seems likely. Drunk History is must watch TV and Nathan for You is pretty good satire. Watch them and laugh but I would oversell this one. Grade: B

The Spoils Before Dying, July 8th. I've talked previously about how amazing Will Ferrel was in The Spoils of Babylon so I see no reason for the second "season" to drop any in terms of excellence. Funny or Die makes good shows and movies and this will be one of those. Don't let it slip from your radar. Especially if you love satire. Grade: A 

Minions, July 10th. I wasn't on board with this movie until I saw the first trailer. It looks to be all the Minion greatness of the first two movies without some of the less awesome parts. I still don't know if the story can compare to the first one, but I'm also not sure I care. It's a movie all about the minions and I'm excited. Grade: B+

Ant-Man, July 17th. Like everyone out there, I'm skeptical of Ant-Man, but I'm excited about the cast and personnel. I'm a big Paul Rudd fan and I've yet to see a bad Paul Rudd movie (some haven't been "good" but I wouldn't quite call them "bad"). If he has a half-way decent script, this movie should at least be funny with decent action, like Guardians of the Galaxy. I think Rudd will get a decent script because he is writing the screenplay along with Adam McKay with Edgar Wright on the story. If those names don't mean anything to you, don't worry; I'll explain why this is awesome. Adam McKay is the mind behind most of Will Ferrell's best movies (Anchorman, Talladega Nights, Step Brothers, The Other Guys). Edgar Wright is the guy behind the brilliant Cornetto trilogy of Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz and End of the World. In other words, if they write even CLOSE to any of those movies, Ant-Man will be the big surprise hit of the summer. Grade: A

Trainwreck, July 17th. This movie might be a train wreck, but it's the first thing in a WHILE from Judd Apatow. The trailer looks pretty good. Amy Shumer is pretty funny and I'm happy to see Bill Hader get a chance to star in something (aside from Skeleton Twins). I'm being cautiously optimistic for this one, but I think it's got a chance to be pretty good. Grade: B-

Wet Hot American Summer, July 17th. As a Paul Rudd fan, I'm really happy for the 17th of July. I only very recently saw WHAS, but it instantly catapulted into my top 10 satire movies of all time. With the whole dang cast returning (quite the accomplishment considering who that they're all stars) I'm really stoked for this Netflix-helmed reboot. Grade: A

Paper Towns, July 24th.  John Green's first big screen offering, The Fault In Our Stars, was amazingly awesome and a near perfect carbon copy of the book. Green has been just as involved with this project, but this time the cast is better. Nat Wolfe and Cara Delevingne are a step up from TFIOS casting (in my opinion) and the story is fun this time and not sad. But that doesn't mean it isn't still really, REALLY good. I think Paper Towns will be the blast of fun we need as watchers in late July. Grade A

Rick and Morty, July 26th. It's finally coming back! I've shared praise for this one before, so I wont rehash all that right now. Suffice to say this is one of the best animated shows on TV right now and I'm really excited about more episodes. Grade A+ 

There are also movies and such coming out in August but most of the ones I'm excited for are mere speculation. August does feature Fantastic Four, which will be worlds better than the 2005 incarnation. I would also put animated shows BoJack Horseman season 2 and a new show F is for Family on your radar if you like animated comedy. Release dates aren't set for these yet, but I think they'll both be pretty solid (Both on Netflix). August will also feature the release of Documentary Now! a satire show on IFC from Fred Armisan and Bill Hader (so that should be awesome). The fall (September and beyond) will have many more noteworthy TV offerings including Narcos, Fargo and Westworld but you'll hear more about those in the future (I'm so impossibly excited for Westworld, you have no IDEA!) For now keep watching great movies and TV shows and keep your DVRs working and start saving up for those movie tickets because 2015 is shaping up to be elite when it comes to movies and TV. 

A Few Short Reviews

Life's been full so I haven't posted much, but I did feel the need to spread the word about three artists I very recently discovered. They each only have a few songs at this point, but I want them to have a lot more. This isn't a ranking and isn't much of a review. It's more of just a "Here's music you should know" post.

First up is Thee Acquainted. Their EP is available for free on Noisetrade and will be one of the best free EPs you ever find. They have a great feel good vibe that a little punk rock and a little alt rock but is mostly just good music. My favorite song is Caffeine Kiss which is just a delightful song that everyone should know.

Next up we have Zella Day. She can be found on Spotify. Her sound is a slightly pop-ier Lana Del Ray sound which is to say, she's pretty fantastic. Her music is rich with literary references and other interesting traits making the listening experience enjoyable. Fans of Lana (which should be everyone) should definitely check her out.

Finally we have my personal favorite Melanie Martinez. Her debut EP Dollhouse can be found on Spotify as well. Her sound is also very evocative of Lana Del Ray, but what I love about her is the darker, more sinister tone to the songs. My favorite songs are Dead to Me and Dollhouse. Dollhouse is one of the best songs I've heard in 2015 with beautiful haunting lyrics describing family life as a dollhouse, but also placing the perspective of the singer as a dollhouse saying "I see things that nobody else sees". My favorite lyric, however, is "Everyone thinks that we're perfect, please don't let them look behind the curtains". I find her music to be beautiful, haunting and profound- many of my favorite traits of Lana.

As a final note, you should also check out Echosmith. You probably know their song Cool Kids and maybe even Bright, but the rest of Talking Dreams is amazing as well. That's it for now. Listen and enjoy.

Bad Movies: A Rank-ing

This post is over a year in the making, but before we get to the actual rank-ing, as it will be called in this post, a little back story is required. First, I've always been really intrigued by bad movies. My dad pointed me toward Mystery Science Theater 3000 at a young age (but not too young) and I took to it like a pig to the slop those movies are. It bothers me that terrible movies are still coming out, but now there are few people to dissect them for the garbage they are. But despite the high level of awfulness of these movies, they're also amazingly entertaining.

As another comment before we get into the rank-ing, I see movies on a spectrum. Naturally there are really good movies that are well worth watching. I would call these "good or really good movies". After this is a category of movies that are still a big deal and get lots of press but are just terrible (think Transformers 2-4 and The Movie that Will Not Be Named). I can usually point these clunkers out from the first trailer. I call these "bad or really bad movies". I try to see as few of these as possible. Rotten Tomatoes does a good job sifting through bad action/drama movies, but I don't follow their comedy guides very much. More on that some other time.

Finally there is a third category: "bad movies that are so absurd they become good". The chief example here is Sharknado. Most people have heard of that now, and many have even seen it. It's a really good example of a movie that so absurd (a tornado made of sharks) that it becomes amazing. Sharknado will most definitely make this list, but you need to read on to see where it rank-ed.

This list is the top 10 best bad movies as determined by the criteria of being absurd AND enjoyable. It's nescessary to note that the worst movies we watched (Allan Quartermain and the Temple of Skulls) didn't make this list because they were so BAD!!! This is NOT a ranking of the worst movies (for if it were The Movie that Will Not Be Named would surely be here). This is a ranking of the best movies that are so bad they became amazing. All of these movies come with my personal recommendation that, if you liked Sharknado for it's absurd beauty, you will most likely like these movies as well.


In Portland, Oregon 25+ movies of the "bad movie" genre were watched by Daniel Gillespie and Andrew Jenkins. Here's what they found to be the "best"

10. Blast Vegas: This movie isn't great, but it does benefit from bad (yet recognizable) acting by Frankie Muniz (who really did some remarkable work back in the day). In this movie a group of college age friends in Vegas unleash this crazy storm and have to stop it with a pharaoh's sword or something. This movie ranks this highly for it's valiant effort to force together the "teen party", "storm" and "ancient curse" sub genres of bad movies.

9. Airplane vs. Volcano: Explanation is not really needed for this one. There's an airplane under attack by a volcano. But the ending and truly awful dialogue makes this stand out. This movie also has a very high potential for funny riff jokes as there are many slightly suggestive jokes to be made throughout. It's better for the jokes it generates in the watcher than for it's actual merit.

8. Big Ass Spider: This movie stars the same guy as in Airplane vs Volcano, but he's a lot better in this. However, the best part is, BY FAR, his mexican side-kick who is a stereotype and knows it. He says many beautiful, wonderful things. Also, as surprising as this may be, spiders and insects aren't that common in this genre, but this movie has a big one and lot of absurd chaos to go along with it.

7. Buffalo Rider: We generally kept our movies pretty current, but after watching the wonder Guy on a Buffalo youtube videos, we had to check out the whole thing. Watch those videos (if you haven't) and then watch this movie because it is just a great. The song alone sets it above many other movies featuring the wonderful line, "his love for the buffalo gave him his name". Seriously. Just watch it.

6. FDR: American Badass: You really don't need more than the title to watch this one. It's about FDR and he's a badass. This movie has higher profile acting and MUCH higher production value. It's probably even better than this place in the rankings, except it knows and tries to be absurd. Most of these others have a different feel to them. If you need more selling points: Machine gun wheel chair, werewolf Nazis. 'Nuff said.

5. Sharknado: I have to thank Sharknado for re-energizing this genre and passion for bad movies, but it's not the best one out there. It's really bad in the right ways (it's sequel was just BAD), with stupid insane characters and situations. Most of the mockery centers on the teenage characters. If you haven't seen this, of course it's a must see and a rightful number 5, but there are better bad movies out there.

4. Black Sheep: Like this gem. This movie features mutated sheep that are going on a murderous rampage, but when the sheep bite you YOU TURN INTO A SHEEP! This premise is exactly as amazing as you imagine it to be. This movie is British (so you get the bonus of accents!) and the acting is pretty good. It's really violent but in the right absurd kind of way.

3. Ghost Shark: This movie is like Sharknado on steroids. It's about a ghost shark that can APPEAR IN ANY BODY OF WATER!!! We're talking bathtubs, wet windshields, buckets, swimming pools, anything. The carnage in this movie is AMAZING with a pretty decent story to along with it (something about a curse). The one draw back with this movie is trying to find it online, but I'm sure you can get ahold of it with a little effort. And trust me, it's worth the work. It features some of my favorite death scenes in all movies ever.

2. Abraham Lincoln vs Zombies: I've never seen Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and very likely never will. Because I love this ripoff SOOOOO much. Basically Abe slaughters a lot of vampires, but the twist a the end can rival the great twist endings of M. Night Shyamalan. All fans of bad movies and cheesy horror movies need to search this one out.

1. Santa Slay: This movie genuine became a top 5 Christmas movie and I plan to watch it annually. Everything about this movie is unbelievably awesome from demon Santa attacks to swearing old ladies. You almost don't need to mock this movie. It's that awesome. I am serious in saying this movie should have the biggest cult following ever and should be a yearly part of Christmas celebrations. Because we all con only watch Elf and It's a Wonderful Life so many times. Sometimes we need to Demon Santa destroy some stuff.

I hope this list will provide many wonderful memories for you and your friends. I promise you the top 5 movies on this list will provide some of the most absurdly entertaining hours of your movie lives. Watch them. Comment below with other personal bad favorites and what you like best.